(I wish I would have been able to take a picture or two. By the time I thought about it, and had the opportunity, the moment had passed. You'll have to use your imagination.)
Last week I was at a church committee meeting. The meeting was very productive albeit a bit long; I was there for over three hours. Earlier in the day my husband and I had gone out to lunch. We don't normally have the opportunity, but being Veteran's Day we both had the day off. The lunch was wonderful (and the company even better). I wasn't sure how my blood sugars were going to react to the difference in schedule and menu. I bolused the best I could, but sometimes you just have to guess.
About half way into the meeting I started feeling.. weird. It felt like a low was coming on. I kept checking my CGM to see how I was trending. Everything there looked good. I was hovering right around 120. I checked my blood sugars to confirm, and the difference was only a few points off. I then checked my pump to see how much IOB (insulin on board) I had. That's when things got more complicated. I don't remember how much was on board, but I do remember it was a LOT more than I was hoping would be. I reduced my basal for the next hour and munched on 4 Starbursts. (One of each flavour. I have to keep the package balanced.) I kept checking my CGM about every 15 minutes to see if I had over corrected or started to drop. No change. I still hovered around 120.
At the point when my basal reduction ended I checked my blood sugars again. It still confirmed that my CGM was being super accurate. I also still had quite a bit of IOB. Another temp basal and four more Starbursts and I kept watching my CGM.
The meeting wrapped up and everyone was leaving. I had a little more business to take care of so I hung around. I was listening in on a discussion but checked my CGM a couple times. That's when it happened.
No, my CGM didn't show a drastic change. It was still showing a near perfect flat white line. One of the gentleman tapped me and quietly asked if I was okay. I assured him that I was okay, that it was just a rough evening.
Just a rough evening.
There was no proof of it being rough, unless you counted test strips and Starbursts wrappers. If you looked at my meter and my CGM graph you would have seen a near perfect 4+ hours. I had nothing to prove to anyone that it had been a rough time.
Yet, I was tired and worn out from it.
Diabetes is an invisible disease. People can't see it. They can see evidence of it, sometimes. They see the insulin pump clipped to your belt or the CGM sensor on the back of your arm. They see you pull your meter out at the lunch table. They see all the technology but they don't see diabetes.
And sometimes, even that same technology doesn't see diabetes.
It may be invisible but I sure feel it.